February 16

2 comments

A story of song and mourning

By IsayaBelle

February 16, 2024

grief, lifestory, meaning, mourning, singing, song, transition

If you’ve been around lately, you know that my life has been turned upside down these last few weeks with death, grief, immense joy and changing plans… Too many curve balls to even count.
And here I am, in the middle of all that, navigating it as well as I know how to, implementing my "Live a Goddess Life" motto and system, undeterred, in joy and sadness, in darkness and in sunshine.
You can read the previous blog posts to find out more, as this is turning into a saga...

Before hopefully moving on next week to lighter subjects, I want to share a weird and amazing event that happened last week, in between death and funeral, in between shadow and light.

A little background first.
I’m a singer.
Not a professional one, but I‘ve been singing most f my life, alone or in groups, choirs, bands, and the like.
I love it. It’s my life’s joy and music in general is always lifting me up or accompanying me everywhere, in every circumstances.

On January 27th, leaving my house to go to a singing rehearsal, I got the message that my bestie’s husband had died.
Of a stupidly fast illness that quite literally had him vanish, body and mind, in less than a month, at the age of 56.
Relief (he was already so gone and suffering), Pain, Shock… you name it.
I decided to still go sing and then leave for a girl weekend I had planned with a different bestie.

Later that very day that I learnt my friend had died, I bumped into a side walk a little harder that intended and got a flat tyre.
Of course that was an hour and a half away from my house.

In French, the word for puncture literally means die.
Thanks Universe for the confirmation…

Long story short, after a call to my hubby to try and get the insurance to cover for a qualified person to come and change my tire (I’ve never done that in my life…), I was reminded that my 22 years old son actually lived 10 minutes away and knew how to change a tire (yes, I had forgotten!!) and he came to rescue his mama!

The next day, here I go, on the road back to my home, around 90 minutes, as the night was slowly falling, through a very rural, very empty area…
Slightly worried that the wheel might have another issue, I decided not to listen to any music, so I could "hear the car" (I don’t make much sense when I’m worried!!)

Very quickly, I began singing.
No words, just syllables.
A very slow, mournful modal melody, with intricate melodic ornamentation, in a reverent, devotional atmosphere.
And the "sentences" started repeating themselves.
I felt I wasn’t choosing or directing any of it.
It was being sung through me.
I ended up singing for the whole journey, almost 90 minutes straight.
Slowly, very slowly, some words started emerging, in Greek, French and English, but still intermingled with nonsensical syllables and "words".
A few names also.
All dead people, mostly this recently deceased friend, but many more…
As if I was singing and mourning all the dead people in my life.
Acknowledging them, one by one.
I sang of the grave of my deceased to honour their memory.
Unplanned, unwritten, unrehearsed.
A chant for the dead.

As I was driving though the darkening winter countryside, my own voice was weaving each of my dead a shroud, a blanket of music and love.
Needless to say the tears were falling abundantly on my cheeks.
It felt like a mystical experience.
Like I was somehow accompanying each and every one of them in their journey to the next plane of existence.
It was beautiful (if I say so myself).
Completely improvised and as if the music was sung through me, if that makes any sense.
When I reached home, the endless incantation ended as if of its own volition, as if it was finished.

Now if you know me at all, you know that this feels way too out there for my Gaia grounded person.
And yet.
I wasn’t done being surprised.

A few days later, at the actual funeral, my bestie had chosen to have a wordless ceremony, simply accompany the moment of remembrance before the actual burial with music.
She had chosen her husband’s favourite religious singer: Soeur Marie Keyrouz.

Soeur Marie Keyrouz is a Lebanese nun, vocalist, and musicologist renowned for her mastery of Byzantine and Eastern Christian music. She has released numerous albums, captivating audiences worldwide with her hauntingly beautiful voice and profound spirituality. Soeur Marie Keyrouz's passion for sacred music transcends cultural and religious boundaries, offering listeners a transcendent experience of divine beauty and grace.
Critics and audiences alike have praised her ability to evoke a sense of transcendence through her vocal expression, often characterized by its purity, clarity, and heartfelt delivery.
Overall, the music sung by Soeur Marie Keyrouz can be described as a sublime blend of ancient sacred melodies, rich cultural heritage, and profound spirituality, resonating with audiences across cultural and religious boundaries.
Let me specify that I did know of Soeur Marie Keyrouz, but hadn’t listened to her or discussed her in any way with anyone for over 20 years.

Of course, I don't claim that my car chanting equalled her amazingness in any way.
However, a few days later, standing in front of my friend's casket, when her voice filled the space around us with beauty and spiritual magic, I recognized some of the melodies I had sung in that very special moment.
The same energy emanated from Soeur Marie Keyrouz’ hymns melodies that was conveyed in mine when honouring my dead loved ones.

Synchronicity?
Magic?
Sure.
And maybe an energetic connection with Alain, my recently deceased friend who loved Soeur Marie Keyrouz.

In all cases, two magic moments.
One in my car, at dusk, alone with the dead, intertwining their lives and ascensions with my voice.
And one in that tiny graveyard, in full sunshine, under the blue sky, looking at the glorious scenery, surrounded by music and spirit.

If you wish to listen to Soeur Marie Keyrouz, you can begin here:
https://open.spotify.com/album/7CVTIPo59NB4LWPo4F7cKX?si=VoT6i7p5QuqtfioI6h2_WQ

So much for today ...
I would be so happy to hear from you about all that.
Thank you in advance for your comment.
See you soon, for my next adventures!
Until then I send you love, light and gratitude.
Isaya

PS:
If you now understand that you have been coding for crap, and you want to move on,
If you’re done living in fear and are eager to begin Living a Goddess Life TODAY,
If you have had enough of letting the world police you and push you to fit in,
If you know you desire to align with the Goddess in you,
If you feel you need assistance to let go of your past and fully step into your present and glorious future,
If you’re ready to rewrite your story for one where happiness is a daily given,
If you’re ready to move from letting yourself down into radical responsibility towards yourself,
If you’re willing to stop betraying yourself every chance you get and embrace absolute self-love,
If you're finally ready to make your well-being a priority, put yourself first, invest in yourself … and back yourself up !
Book a free Dare to Shine discovery call and let’s see if we are a fit for coaching to unleash your inner Goddess! https://bookme.name/isayabelle/lite/30-minutes-free-discovery-call

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