So I’ve been quite ill for a couple of days.
Again. Yes I know … I was ill last week and already wrote about it …
But you see … it didn’t really go away …
And I F*hate it.
I hadn’t been ill for 2 years, not ever since I stopped smokingĀ (a story for another time … or read everything about how I convinced myself in every possible way that I was a non-smoker HERE).
So here I am again, low energy, pain in my lungs/heart area … and coughing … a lot.
I had planned to go to a Christmas market to present my paper handmade notebooks and other paper crafts … (Wait, you don’t know anything about that either ? … O boy ! I’ve been way from the blog zone way too long … Visit my Etsy shop to see what I do with my hands when my mind is busy inventing new e-courses and dreaming wild dreams!).
So … Christmas market … I went. Spent the day. Sold a little. Coughed a lot.
On the way back home (45 minutes of driving in the middle of nowhere …) I started thinking about this cough again … and decided to try someĀ Ho’oponopono forgiving technique OUT LOUD and see what would come up …
Sometimes when I let my voice take over my thoughts, I follow my intuition and when I listen to myself … it’s like a light bulb moment … Like I’m “hearing”,Ā “discovering” something new about myself … I had tried that the day before, following Laura Diane Soer‘s advice in her new and Oh so powerful program Inside Delphi.
So … I started the “formula”
I’m sorry
Please forgive me
I forgive you
I love you
Thank you …
And then ?
Then something that had been in plain sight but Oh so hidden … surfaced.
It was ME I needed to forgive, the young naive beautiful me who embarked in life on enthusiasm and a strong belief in true love, a young woman who got shattered and almost destroyed by habits and musts and fears and shoulds and other people’s lacks and inadequacies and my own … Oh my own too …
So I started voicing this forgiveness to that young me. And tears started running down my cheeks …
Tears of having been heard …
Because in fact she was the one crying.
So I drove and she cried and we both forgave.
And then forgave some more.Ā
I forgave her.
She forgave me.
We both forgave a few other people involved.
And then I reached my house… I live in the South West of France in a rural area with no neighbors … A big old house with a massive “garden” area, that used to be a BandB and a family house, which I love and hate at the same time, as we often do with most things or people who’ve been in our lives for too long a time…Ā
I unloaded the huge amount of stuff that came back from the market unsold …
Ready to call it a day and unwind with some tea and Netflix and coughing syrup if necessary …
But then it hit me … All this forgiveness … And I still felt like there was some kind of entanglement… And I was still coughing …
So I took off my shoes and walked outside again, in the middle of my front “garden”, on the cold (yeah, we’re talking winter here, no ice cold, but still…) wet (it has been raining ALL day…) ground.Ā
And I prayed. Turning counter clockwise like Amanda said (check who Amanda is HERE, if you’re interested) I asked Gaia to take it all.
All the gunk.
The sadness.
The resentment.
The regrets.
The anger.
The pain.
The remorse.
The illnesses.
The guilt.
The shame.
I unloaded it.
I released it.
ALL.
To Gaia.
In Greek Gaia means “Earth”.Ā For me Gaia is not just a Goddess.
She IS the planet. She literally IS the ground and the trees and the rocks and the lions and the rivers and … the little patch of land I was standing on in my “garden” (which by the way was getting hotter and hotter with my spinning over it… and the energy of Gaia coming up to me!)
I could feel Gaia embracing me, and sending me love, and … more love.
At the same time, I could feel the sh*t going down my arms and legs and into the ground, deeper and deeper into the earth until it reached the center of the planet where fire and lava and fusion live and destroy everything (very Kali of Gaia, isn’t it ?).
And then I stopped turning.
And I realized I’d been crying all along.
And I thanked Gaia.
Then I did one last turn thanking all directions and all elements of Gaia for helping me release and let go.
And I thanked again.
My gratitude to Gaia was, is and always be immense.
Now I also understand more of the why I have always felt it.
She is all powerful, the beginning and the end of everything.
Just remember to ask her.Ā
She was, is and always be here. (yes, here, where you stand)Ā
Try it sometimes.Ā
It’s life changing.Ā
Beginning in January I will be offering a few different ways to understand and work with Gaia, and grasp how she can assist you everyday. Stay tuned!
So Iāll see you lovely people.Ā
In the meantime, Iām sending, as always, love, light and gratitudeĀ
IsayaĀ
PS :Ā Join my freeĀ Facebook GroupĀ and tell me what you think, I love hearing from you !
PS2 : I should also mention that I’m doingĀ 21 days of Angelmas, the amazing free program of the awesomeĀ Corin GrilloĀ … And I was on Day 19, Th day of the Gift of … Divine Love ! Serendipity ! Thank you, thank you !