So I can’t breathe.

I physically can’t, I mean.
I have not been able to breath though my nose for more than a year.

I have a polyp in my left sinus.

A big one.

And I cannot breathe.

I’ve seen various doctors.

Some want to operate … They also say that any operation would not prevent it from coming back… and we might need to operate again … every six months to a year.

I already wasn’t in favor of an operation but that got me even more worried …

So I went to see other doctors … to see if I could have another opinion … a different advice.

And I got some…

Osteopath: I’ll massage you (makes me feel better for a while … and then not so much)

Homeopath: Here are some remedies … That should do it (and it … doesn’t really …)

Energy healer: I’ll clear that for you (again … not so much…) and you should use crystals (I plucked one up my nose yesterday night … I DID feel better … but then a few hours later … Here I am, not breathing again …)

What is the most annoying is that EVERY person I meet (even people unrelated to this story!) tells me … “Take a deep breath” or “You should breathe a little…”

The list goes on because it’s been a year of this … but I’ll cut it short for you … And it’s not the reason I’m writing about this.

Anyway,as you can imagine, I am tired.

Tired of not breathing. Tired of explaining why my voice is “weird”? Tired of feeling unwell. Tired of not finding solutions. Tired of being told “you should do this, you should do that…”

Tired and fed up. Really fed up.

The main idea here is that I seem to have a nice capacity for manifesting shit little not dangerous illnesses that are slightly incapacitating … but not that much, so basically I’m still supposed to keep on doing the stuff I do… because I’m not REALLY sick… (again I will not make a list of these … Partly not to bore you to death and partly because I realize right NOW that I’m ashamed of them … as if they’re “dirty” and “my fault”)

I’m not really interested in the why I do this to myself (or authorize the Universe to dot his to me!).

I have a few clues… But basically  they are none of YOUR business !

So I’m tired. And fed up. I want this to stop. I want to manifest perfect health for myself. NOW.

I want the blocks to dissolve and disappear. MAGICALLY. NOW. PLEASE, PRETTY PLEASE UNIVERSE.

I NOW decide to focus 95% of my energy on that issue (the rest can wait! I do need 5% to keep functioning though!)

So help me please.

And I will not until all the work is finished to breathe (in French it means take a break …)

I will breathe NOW.

I am breathing.

I can breathe.

NOW.

I’ll tell you how it goes.

Tell me if you can relate …

Sending love, light and gratitude

Isaya

 

 

 

 

 

 

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